(Mathew 26:12,14-16,52-53,56,74-75):
When Jesus mentioned His burial, Judas's last hope of a kingdom position was gone and his wicked, greedy, thieving heart determined to get something out of it. Since Jesus would not fit Judas's mold, Judas would try to destroy Him and make a little profit in the bargain.
When things don't go the way I want, when prayer is not answered according to my personal preference, when my comfort is disturbed -- and I indulge the flesh for a temporary illusion of satisfaction, seeking gratification from a source other than God ..... am I not betraying Jesus?
Am I walking in the steps of Judas?
If Jesus had changed His mind, I would be forever damned. On an impulse of bravado Peter pulled a sword. One sword or 80,000 angels but Jesus rejected both. Surrounded by horror, why did Jesus not change His mind? Because, He said, it was the cup which His Father had given Him to drink.
I have often wondered -- if the disciples had prayed with Jesus in Gethsemane instead of sleeping, would they have deserted Him? When the unexpected hits me in the face, when danger threatens, if I have not been faithful in my prayer relationship with Jesus in total dependence on Him, I too will desert Him, ... walking in the steps of Peter toward a broken heart.
When the painful surprises, the difficulties, the trials engulf me, do I reach for a profane sword or cry out for 80,000 angels? I long to be growing in such deepening prayerful intimacy with Jesus, that I can receive with grace whatever cup the Father gives. It has been said that THE SECRET of all my failure is my failure in secret prayer.
I must be emptied of self because it is only the want of room that hinders all the wealth of grace in Christ from flooding my heart continuously, so that from within may flow those rivers of living water.
(2 Kings 4 - the oil didn't stop flowing until there were no more empty vessels).
If the heart is right, blessing cannot be withheld, it can only be delayed; and to delay such blessing means only that it should overwhelm us when it does come.
As we celebrate Resurrection, let us go with the Peter who couldn't to abide in the Jesus Who could.
Lord Jesus, I can't; You never said I could, But You can and You always said You would!
With love and prayers,